I think we are becoming a people that are accepting of settling.
I can’t decide whether it is because we’re scared of offending someone, or threatened by those who want more or what.
The difference between those photos is 16 months. The left is my after.
I greatly dislike where I’m at right now.
You can tell me I look malnourished, or too skinny or anything about my other photo.
To be honest, there’s no pleasing anyone and I just couldn’t give a shit.
I know I was at the healthiest I’ve ever been, eating at least 2000 calories a day in 6-7 meals. I felt fucking amazing. I looked pretty great too – only about 2% body fat off being able to compete, but I felt amazing.
I felt strong. Powerful. In control. Borderline invincible. I loves myself completely. I had a newfound respect for my body and what it could do. It’s strength, flexibility, my resolution.
I miss that.
When I say I want to lose body fat, or I want to get fit again the most common response is either why or from where.
I understand the from where is meant to be a compliment, but instead of it being a compliment it is more “that goal is silly, I don’t see why you have it.” which, sure, not everyone sees the point in your goals. But I would never question someone else’s goals.
My friends have goals to own 7 houses before they retire.
I could have told them it was impossible or asked why. Instead, I said fuck yeah. And recently congratulated them on their third property purchase.
Why? Because it is my goal.
I want to feel that again and be that person.
I’ve lost me. That me. The me that felt amazing.
It isn’t about looks. It is about feel.
I also can’t help but wonder if some people don’t want to see others achieve their goals. Especially goals they might deem impossible for themselves.
Seeing another reaching something you want for yourself can hurt. It can make you want to give up. Or it can fuel you.
Let’s choose the latter.